HOW MOTHERHOOD HAS CHANGED ME INTO AN ENTIRELY DIFFERENT PERSON

Life with a baby is pure craziness. I’ve been told countless times that the adjustment when you go from zero babies to one baby is harder than going from two to three or three to four! It totally makes sense too. Your life before baby was one of complete freedom. Freedom to come and go as you please. Not having to worry about nap time or feeding another human. Your body was completely yours and your boobs weren’t property to a tiny but demanding little human. I talked about the emotional journey into motherhood in this vlog, but in today’s post, I wanted to touch a little bit more on how motherhood changes you as a woman. Before I get into everything, can we just look at this baby? You guys, I’ve realized she HATES being photographed. How could I birth a baby who hates pictures!? I guess I just have to work with what I’ve got because you know I like to document everything;)Trying to distract her with a chicken wing… She’s sooo not at the stage where I can read to her lol I guess this is all she really wanted!

Dress | Annabelle’s Dress & Bloomers c/o

Okay, now onto how motherhood has changed me into an entirely different woman…

  1. Being selfless is a term I truly understand. You have zero time for yourself and I mean zero. No more going to the bathroom alone, taking 20-minute showers, spending time filling in each eyebrow perfectly (HELLO microblading!), deep cleaning the kitchen, running errands in a leisurely manner. It’s all gone!! I know I sound dramatic (okay, I am most of the time), but to all those prego Moms out there, it comes as a shock no matter what. During those early newborn days everything seems easy peasy and then they start growing rapidly and demand a lot more attention It’s madness, but in the very best possible way. I have learned that I come last in my household and it’s taken a few months to get used to that fact as selfish as it sounds. It’s such an adjustment, but one million times worth it when you look at your perfect baby.
  2. I could care LESS about what others think of me…most of the time. Being on Youtube for the past few years has given me a “dgaf” attitude towards negative people so I do have an edge on this one, but even after having Annabelle it’s gotten stronger! You seriously only care about your baby’s well-being and it’s so freeing. I do have to mention that occasionally I let the comments get to me. So many people tell me I hold her too much, coddle her too much, shouldn’t let her sleep in our bed, need to put her down more, etc.I get hundreds of these comments and emails! It gets TIRING and on some days I’ve had enough! So I feel the need to address the people who choose to parent differently than me. I’m not saying they’re wrong at all. Who knows how I’ll be with my next baby! Maybe I’ll change and want to sleep train from the get-go, who knows. I’m still learning to balance when to address comments and when to let it go. It’s a process;)
  3. Motherhood gives you the utmost respect for other Moms. I look at Moms with multiple children and think of them as super moms. It’s insanity to have a toddler and a tiny baby to take care of 24/7, especially if you’re a stay at home mom. Give me your tips! And to the working Moms. You are so so strong. My Mom was a working Mom and I could tell every part of her ached to be away from me. I understand it now and I sympathize with it. You are doing the best you can.
  4. You start to care less about how you look and more about how your baby looks. Wearing sweats to the grocery store? Best idea EVER! Not getting a mani/pedi in 3 months? Uh, ya! I don’t want to be away from my baby for 1.5 hours+ every 3 weeks. Fake tanning every week like I used to? HA! No time for it now and I wouldn’t be able to hold A as much for fear it would get on her! It’s so much more fun giving her a nice bath and picking out a matching bow with her outfit:) My life is my baby and my baby is my life! Who am I?!
  5. You learn who your true friends are. This is a touchy subject for me. Before I had Annabelle I thought I knew who would be there for me and who wouldn’t after having a baby and boy was I 100% wrong wrong wrong. It takes a true friend and soul sister to stand by you through pregnancy, birth and raising your child. A friend who empathizes with your situation without ever even going through it. A friend who is there no matter what and doesn’t question why you are killing yourself to breastfeed or why you are bawling in the isle at Target because you feel like a failure as a Mom for buying formula. A friend who calls to check-in on your baby or see how you’re doing postpartum. I’ve had two friends stay with me after I had Annabelle. They consoled me when I had baby blues, helped me look up breastfeeding tips, woke up at the crack of dawn to help with Annabelle. These types of friends are GOLD and I treasure them more now than I ever have. I cannot wait to repay them for all they have done for me when they have babies one day. I owe them so much.

And you know what? I love my life more than I ever did before. Through all of these changes, I am a stronger, more confident, more loving women and I thank God daily for putting Annabelle in our lives.

Also, how cute is Annabelle’s outfit!? I LOVE it when babies wear big girl clothes, it’s so cute! This lace dress with a pale blush satin bow is from Pok Fashion Outlet where they sell brand new, authentic and discounted designer clothes from previous seasons. This dress is the ‘biscotti dress’ from Billieblush from their fall/winter 2015 collection. To die for!

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12 Comments

  1. Ale Sams
    August 20, 2017 / 8:25 am

    Loved reading this! My husband and I are expecting our first in December and I love reading and watching your journey through motherhood. It gives me a little bit of an idea of what to expect because some days I freak out about not knowing how life with a newborn will be lol!

  2. August 20, 2017 / 8:51 am

    Can you please tell me which camera do you use? Your pictures are stunning.

    PS: I am a full-time blogger, blogging from last 6 years.

  3. August 20, 2017 / 10:18 am

    Loved your post! Regarding the true friends, I have already noticed it in my life now during my pregnancy. Some people that I was sure would care and be supportive were not. It was painful in the beginning but now I just want my baby to be born and be by my side. My c section is scheduled a week from now! Wish me luck! 🤗

    • August 20, 2017 / 11:42 am

      Good luck on your C-Section, I had one 4 months ago and I wish I could of better taken care of myself! Blessings to you!
      -Flor

  4. EmmaLuise
    August 20, 2017 / 10:22 am

    I loved this blog, as I’m a first time mum too and it just makes me feel proud to be a mum reading this.
    The part about the true friends it’s something that I’ve only just reached my limit on recently. It’s made me realise that some people who I thought were my friends, we’re just there because I made all the effort. And even only there when I was struggling so they can tell me how they did it, making them feel better I guess? But who aren’t there when I’m doing fine and just want a catch up. Your friends who stayed over with you sound amazing. And my close friends who are still around and have kids are amazing help to me too. Hugs for you both x

  5. August 20, 2017 / 11:41 am

    Out of all your blog posts, this one touched me the most. I am 4 months postpartum and have a beautiful baby girl named Ella. She is my world and I’m so happy to have her. The “friends” topic you mentioned is so true. I quickly realized that I only had a couple of friends (at the most) as I got pregnant with my baby girl. But you know what Hayley, I may not personally know you, but I feel and understand you in so many levels. It feels like I DO know you because you’ve helped me out so much with your experiences. Thank you for opening up.
    -Flor

  6. Michelle
    August 20, 2017 / 11:49 am

    How did you get to the point were people’s comments didn’t bother you anymore? I feel like that must be a very freeing place to be. To care for your child the best way you can, and not be bothered by people saying you should be doing it a different way. Teach me your ways!!

  7. Erin
    August 20, 2017 / 1:40 pm

    I love this post! My daughter is 18 months and I feel like I’m still getting used to coming last. Totally worth it but at the same time it’s such an adjustment.

  8. Brittney
    August 20, 2017 / 9:16 pm

    I think you’re a great mom. All of us moms do the absolute best we can for our babies. No need to clarify why you do every single detail. You know you’re baby best and I believe whatever you do for your baby is right. No mom ever does anything they know is bad. Keep up the good work. Other people’s opinions don’t matter.

  9. Sarah
    August 21, 2017 / 10:25 am

    Hi Hayley,
    We are a similar age and life situations ( we are the only one out of our friends married/pregnant) and we are newlywed. I watch all your videos and reading this post has really given me an idea of what it’ll be like and made me feel hopeful and excited. I know they’ll be struggles but I can’t wait. Thanks for this!

  10. August 21, 2017 / 3:44 pm

    I’ve watched your videos for the last year or more and just love watching you grow as a family and also as an individual! And good for you for saying who cares about people’s opinions!!

  11. Miriana Lisanti
    August 23, 2017 / 3:41 pm

    I have been following you since I got pregnant in September 2016. I watched all your YouTube videos and you have inspired me and helped ease my fear of change into motherhood. Thank you for sharing and opening your heart. God bless you and your beautiful family!

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